


Just a number

by GeoApo



Series: Alternating to Direct [1]
Category: Person of Interest (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-28
Updated: 2014-11-11
Packaged: 2018-02-23 01:22:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 13,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2528819
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GeoApo/pseuds/GeoApo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>...Romeo was still sleeping in her bedroom and Root had obviously turned the flirtatious mode on. Not that she hasn’t missed it as much as she hated it...</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Naked... truth

Shaw woke up by the sound of the alarm telling her that she was late for work, since it had already been postponed a couple of times. She stared at the ceiling for a moment until her eyes caught movement in the other side of the bed. Her hand instinctively grabbed the combat knife under her pillow as she slowly turned her head just to find out that there was someone sleeping beside her.

And then she remembered…

_Why is he still here?!_

That’s why she never invited men into her house. You can’t just tell him to leave after sex. Most of them get attached and want more. They want Mornings, breakfast, morning sex (well, the last one can’t be that bad though). Anyway, next time a hotel room or his place -where she can leave whenever she wants- will do just fine.

_For now let’s just pretend that I’m in a hurry for…_

Her thoughts had been interrupted by a soft knock on the door. Her annoyance became anger. One man in her bedroom is enough, she doesn’t need any other visitors. She murmured something containing for sure the word “ _fuck_ ” as she put on her clothes and moved towards the door.

She couldn’t guess who might be but the last person she was waiting for was there, standing at the door and smiling at her with that playful and flirtatious mouth of hers…

“Missed me Sameen?”

_Great… Just great!_

After the last number they worked together which was a couple of months ago, she hadn’t seen Root until now. And it was absolutely deliberate. Not from her side but Root’s. She did call once to check up on her, of course pretending that she only cared about the mission, but Root seemed distracted, like she didn’t had time to talk or didn’t want to. Either way, Shaw never called again.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Shaw said as angrily as she could, “You are going to destroy my cover”.

Root took her fake confused expression as she stepped in -uninvited- while Shaw was standing at the door, dazed and sincerely confused!

“But why? I’m just a pitchwoman working hard to earn my day labor”. The winker smiled.

Shaw rolled her eyes while closing the door. She didn’t had time for games and it definitely wasn’t the right place for that kind of games. Romeo was still sleeping in her bedroom and Root had obviously turned the flirtatious mode on. Not that she hasn’t missed it as much as she hated it, but didn’t like the idea of Root crossing paths with the naked man in her bedroom. It was absurd though. Why would Root care if she is having sex with her partner in crime? She recommended him after all and never the less a girl has to cover her needs.

“Ok huckster, what exactly do you want?”

_And don’t you dare say ‘You’_

Root looked disappointed. She didn’t lose her perky smile though. “Where are your manners Shaw? Aren’t you gonna ask me about my health? I have been shot twice in the last couple of months as far as you know; I could be dead by now.” _Oh and I also want You!_

Shaw’s anger overwhelmed her.  She was mad at Root for operating alone and fighting Decima’s agents without backup, but this was really pissing her off. She called, she asked Finch multiple times how Root was doing, she even dropped by her last known address to check up on her. But yet Root never showed up. She didn’t want to be found and she wasn’t.

_Enough already!_

“Maybe you should be dead…” said Shaw regretting it at the same moment. It was too late though to take it back so she continued. “Isn’t that what you’ve always wanted? To die in a glorious way for your sacred war? That’s what you went for that day at the hotel, right? Maybe I should save you the trouble and call that blonde lady to finish the job”

Root lost her flirtatious smile and stepped back. She already knew that Shaw doesn’t own much of a feeling but it never occurred to her that she couldn’t even care if Root was dead or alive.

Of course, she wasn’t going to reveal how much that hurt.

_You have already finished half of the job Shaw…_

“Oh Sameen, always eager for some action. This time you can settle for a new number, Harold is already waiting at the car.” Root knew that this was the only way to cheer Shaw up and at the same time avoid a conversation about how eager she was to die and for whom…

Indeed, in the sound of “action” and “number” Shaw changer her current angry status into a brightened and full of enthusiasm one.

“Great, I hope your machine emailed my not so Harold-friendly boss that I’m taking a sick day off.” Said Shaw relieved that she wouldn’t have to face Romeo and as a matter of fact neither would Root. She still though didn’t know why her gut was telling her to keep the one-night-stand thing quiet from her.

Root nodded while waiting for Shaw to wear her heels and grab her guns. It was just a moment but it didn’t need more than that, when Romeo appeared naked at the bedroom’s door clearly confused seeing the two women ready to leave the apartment. Shaw didn’t notice him at first, but Root did…. “Hello there” she said with a hard-pressed smile in her face.

_And there it is the other half! A job well done…_

Shaw followed Root’s eyes and ended up at the shocked man. The only word that she was able to say was _FUCK_ , but even that couldn’t come out. She just stood there staring at him, waiting for someone else to take initiative. And thank god someone did…

“Am I missing anything? I’m pretty sure I slept with one of you last night…”

“I’m sure you did” a cold Root interrupted him, not being able to hear anything else “but I’ll need to borrow your _girl_ for the day. Don’t worry though; see will be back in your arms before midnight”

Shaw knew that the three of them couldn’t stay at the same room any longer

  _Dammit they shouldn’t have been in the same room all along._

She walked up to the door while murmuring a “we have to go” thing and her eyes stopped at Root’s for a moment. She was still staring at him but even when she turned around she avoided Shaw’s eyes.

 

The scenery had come into an end but something was still there. Something had changed. Shaw didn’t know what that was, but it was definitely something…

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Screwed up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _On a second thought, an angry Shaw could easily destroy the entire source code!_

That number wasn’t like any other number they had encountered. It was Martine’s number! That blonde bitch that was after them was going to be either a victim or a perpetrator soon. Well, the perpetrator part was the most possible but either way she was associated with Samaritan so they had to keep her close. It wasn’t that easy to find her though. And the Machine didn’t make it any easier. She was the one that send Root the number but didn’t give her any clue about how she’s gonna find her and more importantly how the machine came up with her number in the first place. It’s not like Decima’s agents are on the Machine’s radar every time they commit a murder. It must have been personal, or Martine made a huge mistake blowing her identity.

Back in the car, Root was driving while Harold was sitting next to her and Shaw in the back seat. They told her about Martine’s number and then they kept quiet, like it was nothing else to be said.

Shaw was stealing glances at Root from the mirror but her eyes were focused on the road as she stayed silent in the entire drive. She could feel her cold and steely. Only moving her hands on the wheel and every so often looking nervously at the cars behind them, obviously minding if they are being followed.

That silence was killing her. She had to say something…

“So where are we going?”

No reply from either of them. Only Root casted a glance at her for a moment but then continued her quiet driving.

 

Finally Root pulled the car over and came out. “Wait here.” Her eyes were soft, avoiding contact like if they met any other pair of eyes they were going to reveal all kind of secrets.

When they lost sight of her Shaw took the chance to talk to Harold. “What’s going on here? I screwed up, didn’t I?”

Harold seemed distracted. “You didn’t screw up anything Ms Shaw. Ms Groves was behaving oddly since she got that number in her phone. It’s like she…”

“What?” Shaw stared at him begging for some scoop, but then she realized that Root was coming back.

_Great, when I am searching for her she is nowhere to be found and now that I want her to be late a couple of more minutes she is here just in time…_

She was carrying a small package in one hand and a 45 Automatic Colt Pistol in the other. Shaw took tentatively the package Root was passing to her and scanned it upside down with her eyes.

_I’m pretty sure that’s a bomb meant to be blown right in my face…_

“Do I need to know?” She glanced upon Root and tossed the package aside.

Root closed the door without getting in the car and spoke while walking away. “Insurance! You will know when the time is right to open it.”

_I will probably be dead by that time, but you couldn’t care less, could you?_

Shaw winced inquisitively as she put herself in the driver’s seat.

_So where to now?_

And before she could even finish that thought the Gps took initiative and pointed out their direction. She rolled her eyes and put the car in motion.

_Something is going on here. Root can’t be that grumpy just because she saw Romeo in my apartment. And why the hell was she there anyway? She could just call to inform me about the new number. We have a safe line after all._

 

A couple of minutes had passed until she spoke again.

“At least do you know what’s going on?” She turned to Finch.

“Unfortunately I don’t. Actually I was hoping you could fill me in. What did Ms Groves tell you when she came in your apartment?”

If Shaw had been a little confused before that, now she was fully disorientated.

_She told me about her being shot and… well she practically begged me to show any kind of concern and I shut her down, again. Why do I keep doing this? I did care for her. I tried to reach her. Why didn’t I tell her that?_

“What do you mean? Just that we have a new number”

“But she said that she wanted to speak with you in private. That’s why she came in your apartment and didn’t just call.”

_Oh crap!_

Harold continued after giving it a little thought “I presume she regretted it…”

_I did screw up after all. She wanted to talk to me and I rejected her. Not to mention the man in my bedroom…_

“Yeah, I guess she did…” She said and turned around the car to the opposite direction.

Harold instinctively grabbed his seatbelt as he felt the car accelerating.

“Ms Shaw, I believe we are going the wrong way.”

There was obviously something big coming. Something that Root was going to fight by her own. Last time that had happened Shaw was there to back her up. And that was because she called her and signified it. Maybe she was about to do the same in her apartment but… ‘Romeo’ happened.

_Well, actually ‘Shaw’ happened…_

“No we are not. I’m taking you to John. Then you can go together wherever the hell that gps wants you to go.” _Cause I am going to find that annoying brunette and stop her for doing anything stupid. And then I will explain.._. ( She winced ) _Explain what? That I am not as cold as I seem to be? That I do care about her? That I… How the hell do people explain themselves?_

Finch measured the situation and realized that there was nothing he could say that wouldn’t anger Shaw, more than she already was. It was that look on her face. A look that only appears when she is holding a gun and aims it at her target. It was all objects and values to him. An inexplicably angry Shaw couldn’t fit in the same equation with a bunch of Harold’s question marks and let alone an objection on where she should be going. That would not only stop any kind of program from running but it would also stop the compiling process.

_On a second thought, an angry Shaw could easily destroy the entire source code!_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it’s not much but I’m still in the introductions!


	3. Reminiscence

 

_**1992** _

_A little girl is standing in front of the window gazing at the street. Waiting…_

_It was almost half past two and he was late. Their appointment was at two o’clock every day for the last two years and she was there every day waiting for him._

_Three o’clock. Four, five. She was still there, standing at attention and waiting. Between five and six her father appeared. She didn’t move though. Stood there motionless watching and waiting. He walked into her room and found her behind the window. “He didn’t come. Did he?”_

_Shaw didn’t move. Didn’t even turn around to look at her father. “Not yet”. Her voice was cold and calm. A tear was ready to evacuate her wet eyes but she didn’t blink. She couldn’t let that tear drop. It would have been defeat. It would mean that he wasn’t coming back and the worst part: she knew it._

_Her father kneeled down and put his right hand in her cheek softly turning her head to face him. He smiled in the sight of her big sparkly eyes. “Maybe he found another friend to feed him. Or he went with some other dogs to play”. He knew that he has lying. And she knew it too…_

_“He is dead” she said and let that tear fall. It was a feeling. A feeling of loss and sorrow. She never cared about her relationship with other kids, with her parents, with her friends. But she did care about that dog._

_Her father caressed her cheek and rest his bottom lip on her forehead. It wasn’t a kiss. It was an act of sympathy and fondness. He knew that she wasn’t comfortable with that kind of affection so they had developed their own code of expressing their concern. And it worked. Her sadness had become more tolerable. It was like he split it into two halves and took one for himself. Just with one touch. And that moment she knew she was loved. She knew he would always be there watching over her and nothing bad could happen…_

 

**Now**

It wasn’t very hard to find out where Root was going. That warehouse where they had left her an hour ago revealed all the information she was looking for.

It was more like a storage unit, that’s why she had to pick the locks of most of the storages to find Root’s. The moment she stepped in it she knew it was hers. She could smell her perfume in the air. She could feel her vibration overwhelming her. The self-storage was desperately small but it seemed like she was living in it for long. There was a lamp barely lighting up the ‘room’, a small bed in the corner and in the little space that was left stood a suitcase with a toothbrush, lots of wigs, a laptop and some clothes with an obvious disparity of style among them. The wall was decorated with a map full of notes and scratched out routes. There was only one accented address that hadn’t been erased.

She noticed it and without a second thought move towards the door. Something kept her there though. She turned around and stared at the small bed. Although she denied herself to think about it, the picture of Root sleeping in that bed had already stuck in her mind.

_What is wrong with me?_

Quickly stepped out of the storage and closed violently the door. It felt like there was a ghost in it ready to attack her. But the use of her gun or her knife would be needless. She couldn’t even fight it with bare hands. In fact she couldn’t fight it at all! It was over her power and she hated it. She hated every moment spared thinking of her...

 

Root counted three guards in every entrance, two recons in the rooftops across the street and a dozen or so operatives inside the building. The machine had estimated a 18% chance of success and it was enough for her. She wasn’t afraid to die after all. Only wished she could see Shaw one more time. Just for a moment. So many things she had to say but kept quiet.

She loaded her guns and stood there for a second with her eyes closed trying to reconstruct Shaw’s figure in her mind. She looked back on the past, when she had come to help her modify Samaritan’s servers. It felt for a moment like she actually cared for her. That thought and only made her smile in a sad matter. She could see her climbing up the truck. She could almost feel her face when she had rubbed lightly her cheek. She could almost smell her shampoo, almost hear her voice…

“What are you doing?”

_That was too vivid…_

She opened her eyes and before even realizing it a familiar fist landed on her face and made her pass out…

Minutes later she woke up at her room’s/storage’s bed feeling a sharp pain in her head. She tried to get up but her hand was tied to the bed by a cable tie. The door opened and Shaw walked in but kept silent staring at her with that judicial look.

Root finally spoke; “Oh Sameen and I thought we got past the punching and tying part” she tried to smile but was obviously in pain.

“Enough already! What the hell were you doing?”

“I was only thinking of you!” _Too much truth to seem serious…_

“Stop it! I’m sick of that flirtatious and teasing behavior of yours...” Her anger was overwhelming her and she couldn’t even focus on the real issue. She tried to calm herself down and continued in a softer way; “If you had gone alone in that building, you would be dead by now.”

Root seemed lost. She was angry. She had a mission and Shaw thwarted it. “And why do you care?” she said plainly, without a smile or a teasing. She was too tired for these games.

Shaw noticed the bitter in her voice. She wasn’t playing her. She didn’t even try to smile. She seemed… tired.

“You are an asset. If we lose you then the contact with the Machine will be lost and so will be the war.” She got closer and cut off Root’s bond before pulling herself away again.

“Asset…” Root repeated quietly like it was a curse. She sat up in the bed and huddled up hugging her legs.

But Shaw wasn’t even looking at her. She was afraid of those eyes. She was afraid that would actually snap and either hit her or kiss her.

_Kiss her?Where did that come from?_

She kept staring at the map in the wall with her back turned on Root while trying to understand her way of thinking.

_She visits me to tell me something in private but she doesn’t. Then she is standing with her eyes closed outside of a Decima’s facility ready to go Rambo in it._

_What the hell is wrong with her?_

_She was going to get herself killed!_

_Oh my god, Root…_

And while she was realizing the ‘Goodbye part’, Root whispered something with a tremulous voice… “I was ready to die. Why can’t you just let me die?”

That didn’t sound well in her ears. Not only what Root had said but how she said it. She turned around and faced full of surprise a totally different person. She had drawn her legs close to her body and squeezed them with her hands while her head was resting at her knees. It almost terrified her seeing Root like this. Root, who had been the most annoyingly cheerful person she had ever met. That dynamic, brilliant and full of life woman had broken into pieces at a split second.

“Root…” _Please look at me. Talk to me dammit!_

When she didn’t get any response she knew she had to get closer, even if that horrified her.

Eventually, she stepped forward and kneeled in front of her. Only when she touched lightly her knee Root raised slowly her head. She glimpsed surprised at her for a moment and then looked away as if she was embarrassed. There was nothing embarrassing in the scene though. She just knew that she wouldn’t get any consolation from Shaw. She only knew how to hurt, despise and contemn her.

And as if Shaw heard her thought she reached her jaw and turned softly her head to face her. Root closed her eyes and let a tear drop on Shaw’s hand. She knew that she was staring at her near at hand. She was even feeling her breath in her neck but still kept her eyes closed. Just to erase all the other senses and intensify that touch. The only touch she had ever taken from her.

“Root…” Shaw said gently and she eventually opened her wet eyes and faced her.

She continued calmly and decisively “I will not let you die. I can’t…”

Root shivered as Shaw put her hand on her cheek and caressed it softly. She was looking right at her eyes and the next moment moved slowly towards her, raised her head and rested her bottom lip on Root’s forehead. They had both closed their eyes and were just standing there.

Root couldn’t tell what that gesture meant but it felt so familiar. It was Shaw’s way of comforting and caring.

Moments later, Shaw pulled away giving her a little space. Not that she needed it. The only thing she wanted was her. And she had her there. If only she could pause the time and prolong that moment, that touch…

Root wiped away her tear and smiled at her. Not with that playful smile of hers, but with an entire new one. It was sweet, sincere, full of gratitude…

 

 


	4. Run to the hills

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Run for your lives!

Shaw pulled away her hand from Root’s knee and as she made a move to stand up the woman in the bed grabbed her wrist. She was staring at her with wet eyes, begging her to stay a little longer. Begging for one more touch...

“What?” she said with a voice full of kindness and comfort.

Root took a deep breath and looked up at Shaw as she spoke “This morning, I came to tell you…”

“I know” Shaw interrupted her quickly. She didn’t want to hear the rest. This ‘ _goodbye_ ’ had to remain unspoken. Because if it didn’t, she wouldn’t feel the need to say it in the next suicide mission and Shaw couldn’t prevent that one.

“No you don’t.” Root stood up and neared her. “I need to say it…”

Shaw instinctively pulled away as the taller woman raised her hand in order to touch her.

“Maybe I don’t want to hear it.” Her voice had turned again into its usual cold and distant way. She felt Root’s disappointment when she saw her eyes gazing the floor as she let her hand fall.

But she really couldn’t hear it. And she knew that it wasn’t only ‘ _goodbye_ ’ what she wanted to say. It was more. It contained feelings and thoughts that she wasn’t ready to hear. They made her uncomfortable and more importantly they frightened her. And it wasn’t because she didn’t know how to react. On the contrary, it was exactly her reaction that scared her!

“Please, I may not live another day to say it…”

Shaw shivered unintentionally in the sound of that. She couldn’t even imagine her life without that ‘perky psycho’ flirting and teasing her.

Every day she was casting glances at the make-up stand wishing she would come and brighten her crappy work. And the times that Root was actually there, she was pretending to be annoyed by her presence. It was their game. And it had no winner or loser. Just two women trying to create a communication line between the walls themselves had built.

“Ok. This is the part where you tell me what’s going on… and only!” She seemed decisive and obdurate to know the truth. It was loud and clear that something was wrong but for some reason Root was keeping it to herself. And it was driving her crazy. It’s not that she had to save her. She will always try to save her after all. Just that she didn’t know from whom and especially for what. She couldn’t believe that a woman like her would just give up and get herself killed so easily. And even if she did, Shaw wasn’t gonna let that happen.

“Everything is fine. You should really go help Harold and his pet find Martine. I promise I won’t need another rescue for the day.”

Her playful smile had return and she generously donated it to Shaw. Although, the angry woman didn’t buy her altered mood she agreed on her suggestion. It wasn’t what she wanted but knew that Root was right. It was an important number so they could use all the help they can get. Anyhow, if she didn’t want to reveal any information there was no possible way that you could get it out of her. Not even with torture.

_Well, actually she might have enjoyed that..._

“Fine, but if you do need to be rescued you will call me, right?” _Why did I say that? I just passed her the ball for another flirtatious…_

“Sameen, I am always trying to be shot so you can jump on me.” She licked her upper lip, “Or you can do it without the ‘shot’ part!

_…comment. God I hate her!_

Shaw rolled her eyes frustrated at herself for not thinking twice before speaking. She turned around as angrily as she could even though deep down she was actually satisfied seeing Root being again… Root!

“One more thing” said without looking back. She didn’t have to. She already knew that Root was striking her with her eyes. “When we are done with Martine, you are gonna tell me what were you doing outside of Decima’s fortress”.

Root nodded even though Shaw wasn’t looking at her. They might not communicate sufficient with words but they are pretty good at figuring out what the other woman implies.

And it was crystal clear to Shaw what Root was implying. Not the nodding part but the part that she is hiding from her and will continue hiding; even though she silently agreed on revealing everything when the time came. However, she didn’t say anything. Only left as she had come, stealthy and confused. Because she knew it wasn’t the right moment to establish her disagreement and more importantly she was too afraid to look at those eyes and know that she might not see them again.

.  
.  
.  
.  
.

An hour later she met Harold and John outside of an abandoned warehouse in the middle of nowhere. They had tracked Martine there and were ready to raid in. Or at least John was…

She did a short reconnaissance in the area and gave John the signal to burst into the warehouse as soon as she finished setting her bolt action rifle. Only three operatives were in the building, including Martine, and all of them were on her shooting range.

She had already installed her favorite part of the rifle. The laser! Not that she needed it to aim, just to intimidate. And it worked. They had laughed when they saw John carefree going alone in there, but when her laser appeared they froze. That switch in their behavior made her smile shrewdly and it surely was one of a very few things that could make Shaw smile.

John took their guns and tied the two men in a column leaving Martine for last while Shaw was climbing down her position to enter the warehouse along with Harold, who was watching the scene from a safe distance.

Martine wasn’t that scary after all; _at least a mobile-phone-free and tied-in-the-chair Martine!_

Although they hopelessly started interrogating her, she wouldn’t split out anything. Shaw did offer to torture her but a judicial look from Harold was enough to exorcise that thought and let her disappointed. The only thing they could do is to search her phone. And luckily (or not) it was enough revealing. She had received a text, obviously from Samaritan, which pointed her in a direction using map coordinates. Harold opened his laptop and typed them.

Suddenly his face darkened as he raised it and looked surprised at both Shaw and John. They instantly realized that something was out of place.

_Dammit this whole day is out of place!_

“These coordinates point to the place where we left Ms Groves this morning.”

Shaw took some time to comprehend what she had just heard and the next moment she found her hand clenching Martine’s neck.

“What were you going to do?” She heard herself shouting and kept squeezing her. She couldn’t control herself and certainly would have cut that neck off if John wasn’t there to pull her away. Martine started coughing desperate for some air, but Shaw couldn’t hear her. She couldn’t hear anything. Not even Harold telling her to calm down. She could only hear a buzzing in her ears and somewhere far away Root’s voice saying _goodbye_.

She kneeled down touching the floor and tried to breathe. It wasn’t easy. It felt like all of the feelings she should have had in her life but didn’t were coming to crush her. They overwhelmed her and stopped every breath she tried to take.

Eventually she managed to stand up and face Martine. “That’s why we got your number, right? You are the perpetrator and Root is the…” She couldn’t say it, but she had to “…victim”.

Her anger increased instantly when Martine started laughing. John felt it and grabbed instinctively her arm to prevent a very possible murder.

“Do you really think that my number came up? I don’t exist! I’m a ghost for your precious machine and therefor I do not own a number” she said looking mockingly at Shaw.

“But Root said…” Harold started talking obviously puzzled but then it hit him. “It wasn’t Martine’s number…” he said turning around to face Shaw.

“…it was Root’s!” she finished his sentence staring lost at nowhere.

Martine continued, “Congratulations! You just earned a toaster! Do you know what really surprises me though? The fact that she didn’t tell you. Because I’m pretty sure that I made it clear this morning that we talked. And hell even the Machine knew, that’s why She sent her the number.”

_Root knew?!_

It all made sense now. Root’s behavior, her effort at avoiding any kind of conversation, her suicide mission, the _‘goodbye’_ , was all summed up. Only one thing was out of place…

“How did you find her?”

Martine smiled at her, “Thank you for asking me that. That’s my favorite part of my ‘interrogation’... We didn’t find her. We are finding her every little moment! Did you actually think that she could mess with our businesses and stay unpunished? Everyone could see her through that camera in the hotel but you can imagine our surprise when we realized that Samaritan, this brilliant AI that can spot a terrorist from miles away, couldn’t recognize her. So we searched. We checked each and every server. It took months but we found it. We found her blind spot. We found Samantha Groves. And as a matter of fact, while we are sitting here enjoying my perfect performance all the other agents are searching for her. And you know what? ‘She can run but she can’t hide!’ Well, I always wanted to say that!"

 

 

That last sentence didn’t have any recipients. The three of them had left just after the sound of Joe Louis’ quote!

 

 


	5. Perfect Strangers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Root fans, I'm so sorry...  
> I guess i'm not a nice guy after all!

Shaw was driving... That definitely was the closest to death any of them had ever been. Even John was worried that Root might have better chances at surviving this day than they did. Not to mention Harold’s reaction… or to be accurate, non-reaction!

After several minutes of silence John finally spoke. “How do we even know where Root is? Because there is no way she’ll still be where you left her this morning. As I recall she is very…” He thought about it for a moment. It’s not like you can describe Root in one word. “…vigorous.” He sounded disappointed by the choice he had made but knew it was the best word he could find.

“I know where she is and we are going there as well.” Unlike John, Shaw seemed certain and determined. She was back at being the cold-blooded killer he had encountered when her partner was killed. Her face was inexpressive with eyes that reflected tranquility and anger at the same time. You could almost see the nuclear fission happening in her pupil. The energy is not released though. Just stored ready to come out wherever she decides.

Eventually Harold managed to speak clearly motivated by Shaw’s not so intuitive knowledge. “And how could you possible know where Ms Groves is?” He already knew the answer but didn’t want to believe that Shaw could have bugged and tracked every member of the team.

And she confirmed his fear. “I slipped a gps tracker into her pocket.” She made it sound like the most normal thing someone could do. Her response didn’t surprise him at all. Shaw had never disappointed him.

“You never cease to amaze me Ms Shaw. I suppose it takes a lot of skill to slip a device into someone’s pocket without being noticed, especially Root’s!”

Listening to that, her face turned instantly into a child’s guilty face after a mischief. “Actually, she was too busy sharing a moment with me to notice it.”

This time she did manage to surprise him. He knew that Shaw couldn’t connect with people but she had always made it clear to them. Messing with someone’s feelings just to achieve her goal was something new and absolutely unexpected. And he was aware of Root’s feelings first-hand as he was also aware that Shaw was going to hurt her badly. She didn’t disappoint him once again!

Before he could utter a word, he heard Shaw shouting at them “Get down!” and the next moment felt a bullet passing by his head. Obviously they had reached their destination and their hosts had already welcomed them. Shaw knew exactly where Root was and with these men shooting at them didn’t have any choice but to drive through her location. And it was just in time! When their car collided with the thick walls of the building wrecking them she momentarily saw Root tied up at a corner. That was enough motivation for her to step out of the vehicle and start shooting every agent who came between her and the woman they had come to rescue. John followed backing her up. Five operators were down and two others left the scene wounded.

The whole area was a blind spot, apparently they may have had Samaritan on their side but they were still afraid of the Machine. She hadn’t lost the war yet.

When the shooting stopped, Harold got out of the car significantly shocked by the mess his coworkers hade made. He had already foreseen that they would shoot some people but that was something else. A demolished wall, a destroyed car, loads of injured knees and a lot of panic were some of the things he didn’t expect.

Shaw neared Root ready to scold her but paralyzed in the sight of the blood in her shirt. John immediately checked her hand, “It’s just a scratch” he said casting a glance at Shaw.

Root tried to say something but before she could even open her mouth she saw the angry woman turning around and moving towards the exit. “I’ll get a car” she said while walking away. She had to get away as soon as possible. She couldn’t even look at her without thinking that she had felt something. It was agony, fear. It was…

_No! I don’t need this. I don’t need feelings. They make me weak…_

It was very easy for her to interrupt her own thoughts. It’s like she had two different brains thinking at the same time. Not the same thing though. One of them was talking like a therapist trying to tell what she is feeling and the other was her subconscious, the patient, expelling every emotion that tried to come out.

 

The drive back to their shelter was quiet. Nobody wanted to talk, at least not until they were somewhere safe. Shaw was driving and clearly avoiding Root’s eyes. The second had leaned down trying to deflect any cameras. She may have been ready to die that morning but wasn’t going to compromise the other members of the team too.

The moment they stepped in the subway station Harold addressed Root. “You clearly don’t understand the whole point of the team. Do you?”

She lowered her head like a child being scolded while John and Shaw had moved inside the subway car and observed silently the scene. “I couldn’t afford pulling you down with me. There was a plan but you had to get away from me as far as possible. They are hunting me, not you.”

John looked frustrated, if not angry. “You tricked us so that you could die on your own?”

Root shook her head while she kept staring at Harold. “I had to. The chances of survival were low but with Samaritan chasing me I am anyhow… useless!”

“Useless?” Harold was floored by her paltry self-esteem. “You are not disposable Ms Groves and you are definitely not a machine. You don’t just discard yourself because you broke!”

“No, I discard myself because I will destroy anyone that gets close to me”

This whole time Shaw was just standing there listening to the chat. She didn’t know how to react so she remained silent. At least until she couldn’t hear anything else. “So, what was the plan?” Her voice was cold and her attitude so professional. Although she could feel her anger overwhelming her she didn’t show it. The auto pilot was turned on. It was Agent Shaw that requested the information of the mission, a killer looking for his next victim.

The three discussants looked askance at her. They were facing a totally different person and no one realized it. Or almost no one…

“It’s a very simple plan. Actually it was set in motion in the past quite successfully.” Root drew their absolute attention and continued. “After Samaritan’s day one I and the guys started building a virus. A very similar virus to the one that infected the Machine a long time ago. A reset button! The only thing that we had to do was to upload it onto Samaritan’s main servers and wait for a call.”

Harold’s face lightened up. It was an almost brilliant idea. “That’s impossible. You can’t just walk into the most important Decima’s facility and mess with the most valuable servers of Samaritan’s. What about the internet? As I recall the Machine’s virus was uploaded there”

Root smiled at him “As a Grecian poet once said, ‘making the same mistake is not a wise man’s doing’. Machine was enough attached to the internet which made her reachable and vulnerable. They weren’t going to allow Samaritan that kind of weakness so they built a safety net. Servers with only one function: to mediate between the internet and Samaritan. Think about it like an isolation transformer. You don’t connect the power source directly to the powered device. Either you use an electromagnetic induction to keep them apart or at the first infelicity you get grilled."

“The theoretical part is so coherent” Harold was genuinely amazed by the idea, “but I believe the execution was unsuccessful, to say the least.”

“You could say ‘fucked up’!” Shaw commented without looking at anyone. She had turned around and was playing with Harold’s computers. It was like she didn’t care at all that they had just walked out of a shooting and half an hour ago Root was about to be executed in cold blood. She didn’t want to care but it was over her powers, so not displaying it was the next thing she could do.

Root stared at her back for a moment, wishing she would turn around and look at her just as she did in the storage. But she didn’t. _Please, I need to look at those angry eyes of yours even for a second._

Harold broke the silence, “So where is this virus?”

That was the only time that Root seemed uncertain for her plan. "I had made two copies. One for me and one for you in case i... Anyway, when they caught me I instantly destroyed the device that contained the worm. They can’t get their hands in that virus. Because if they do they will rewrite all of the Samaritan’s vulnerabilities that this virus targets. Then we’ll be back at zero and further down!”

Shaw finally moved to face them. Her face was different. You could almost say that she was surprised but in a bad way. “That virus of yours… Did you put it inside the package that you gave me this morning?”

Nobody liked what she was implying but they all guessed correctly about what she was trying to tell. “The car…” Somebody said that. It doesn’t matter who did; they all had the same thought.

Just for a moment they stood speechless until John took the initiative. “Let’s go” He looked at Shaw and she instantly stood up and followed him. After all, she was looking forward to leave this place by the time they had come. There was nothing wrong with the place, only with the woman that was in it. She was afraid that if she stayed a little longer, she would have hit her. But not just punch her in the face; it would have been a rough and endless beating.

Suddenly, while they were walking away Harold’s voice sounded. “Wait. I’ll go with John. Mr Groves requires medical attention”. He casted a glance at Shaw, who tried to argue but Finch had already grabbed Bear’s leash and was ready to go. The two women were standing still looking at each other while the men were leaving.

Shaw broke first the awkwardness of the scenery as she walked back into the subway car and reached for the first aid kit they had stashed. She pointed to the chair. Root hesitantly walked in and took a sit opposite Shaw, in a reachable distance but not too close. It was crystal clear that nobody was going to talk first. The physician opened the kit while her patient was staring right at her eyes and finally speaking.

“I guess I broke my promise.” It sounded playful and confident. But it wasn’t. They both knew it.

Shaw raised her head and gazed at her. Her look wasn’t angry nor cold. It was empty! Root felt it and shivered. She used to enjoy getting her mad. It was a feeling and she was the one to provoke it, even if it was only anger. It was a reminder that she could actually stimulate something inside that ostensibly empty heart. But this time there was nothing there. Not even anger. And it scared her. For the first time she was afraid that she might have lost the game for good.

“I’m ready to hear whatever you wanted to say this morning” she said and continued patching up the wounded hand.

Root smiled “What does it matter?”

“Right, now that you are not suicidal it doesn’t matter. Kind of hypocritical don’t you think?”

Root instantly stood up and looked down at Shaw. She was seized with a sudden impulse to run away, but stayed. “Do you really want to talk about hypocrisy? Maybe you can teach me a thing or two.”

Shaw didn’t move, only closed slowly the kit and looked up. _She knows..._

“Did you really think that I would let you go get yourself killed that easy?”

“Oh please don’t tell me that you even care…” Her voice was bitter and mocking.

“I do” That just slipped off her lips effortlessly.

Root grinned, “Come on Sameen, you don’t need to keep playing that role. The audience has already left. I only have one question. Why did you have to fool with me? You could just slip the tracker while I was passed out.”

Shaw didn’t like the irony in her voice and more importantly she had just expressed a feeling for the first time in her life and Root didn’t even believe her. That’s why she continued the act. Not the act in the storage, that wasn’t an act at all...

“Sadly I don’t just carry around a gps tracker. I rushed out to get it but by the time I got back you were already awake. You have to admit it though, my performance was impeccable!” She confirmed Root’s deepest fear with the most cold and apathetic voice she could make. And of course it wasn’t the fear of tracking her without permission. It was the deception that scared her, especially when it came from the person that she cares about the most!

Root kept staring at her shattered, until she couldn’t… She turned around facing the exit and let a tear drop. The urge to leave had returned but she was still there.

Shaw stood up to give her the deathblow. “What? Don’t you have anything seducing to comment on how I screwed you?”

Root closed her eyes and shed all of the tears she was holding since she was a little girl. It hurt like hell and couldn’t take it anymore!

She tried to run away but a cold hand grabbed her wrist and turned her around. “Don’t touch me.” It had come from Root’s mouth and it was absolutely honest. At least for the moment...

In the sight of her tearful eyes Shaw lowered her head regretting every word she had said. Immediately raised it again and faced her.

She was still holding her wrist while lifting her other hand and wiping away her tears. Root was too wrecked to react. She didn’t even react when she felt Shaw’s hand pulling away from her wrist and touching the back of her neck. Not even when she saw her getting closer. She only moved when Shaw kissed her lips softly.

She raised her hand and clenched the neck that was holding that stubborn and beautiful head. But Shaw didn’t move. Didn’t even try to defend herself. It was like she knew that she deserved it and just stood there.

Root’s hand though stopped clasping. It disobeyed her orders and started caressing Shaw’s neck. She couldn’t fight it anymore. So she stopped…

Her head leaned forward until her lips closed in on the opposite pair. It was a hungry kiss. They both needed it and couldn’t help but show it.

Shaw gave in completely with no remorse, no shame… Root’s hands were fondling Shaw’s waist and neck as she was kissing her lips fiercely. It felt like redemption!

She didn’t know if the other woman had fooled her and at that moment she didn’t care. That moment was about her getting what she always wanted, what she needed…

 

 

 


	6. Heart of steel

Before even realizing it they both found themselves thrashing around in the subway’s walls. Angrily kissing and biting each other’s lips.

It had nothing to do with love or affection. It was war and it was arduous. An ongoing struggle for domination. Hands fighting and fondling while an endless game of looks was underway.

Eventually Shaw managed to prevail. She clenched Root’s arms and pushed her to the computer. Papers, keyboards and screens dropped on the floor when her hands grabbed Root’s hips and lifted her on the desk.

That whole time the kissing didn’t break. It kept on going even when Shaw unbuttoned Root’s pants and slipped her hand in. It only broke for a moment when she pushed three fingers inside Root and heard her moan. She felt her wet and warm. The sweep of her fingers followed a rapidly rocking movement that made the other woman lean her head backwards while groaned.

It didn’t take long to reach orgasm. And it took even less time for Shaw to remove her hand and immediately tie her at the leg of the heavy mahogany desk.

“You have to stay here. No more suicide missions for today.”

Root gave her a sad smile but didn’t talk. She couldn’t find a word to describe her devastation and anger. Only when Shaw cleared the desk of every sharp object and got ready to leave she spoke quietly “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice…”

Shaw turned around to face her but there were no eyes to look at. She had turned aside from her and stared at an empty wall. You could discern though the grief seamed at her tremulous eyelids.

“Root… I’m so sorry”, it was the most difficult and sincere apology she had ever said but it was far from enough.

“No you are not” she turned her head and whipped Shaw with her glower. “It’s only a game to you. The flirting and the teasing, you enjoy it don’t you? You enjoy hurting me! Are you silently laughing at me right now?” Hatred and disgust had come out of her mouth and butted Shaw’s chest in a desperate attempt to scratch her steely heart. “I have to admit it though, I’m impressed! You did manage to screw me multiple times at the same day, literally and metaphorically! At least did you break your record or has this empty heart of yours fucked up someone better than it fucked me?”

Her words were harsh but reflected all the sorrow and the anger that overwhelmed her. She didn’t cry though, couldn’t give her that satisfaction too. Her eyes were wet ready to overflow but she couldn’t blink. Just wished that her abuser would leave soon and let her wallow in her grief.

Shaw hated herself for that. She had felt Root surrendering herself to her. Mind, soul, body… She could almost feel holding her heart in her hands. Vulnerable and naked had granted her the right to do whatever the hell she wanted with it. And she did. She turned it into a million pieces and casted it off.

Shaw opened her mouth to say something but instantly regretted it. There was nothing to be said that her actions hadn’t already said it. But her actions were lying. She wished she could just make her understand how much she meant for her. How difficult it was for her to express that thing she was feeling. That thing that made her heart beat like a 200 dB woofer every time Root touched her. That thing she felt when she gazed at those big bright eyes full of passion and cunning that could annoy and engross her at the same time. But she couldn’t look at them this time. Because this time they only mirrored her figure and it was a cruel and sadistic figure.

So she walked towards the door and only then turned around to face her. But Root wasn’t truly there. She was lost in a storage with a warm and openhearted person who was telling her all the things she needed to hear. Who was holding her with affection and wiped away her tears. Who kissed her forehead and healed every pain and agony she had ever felt in her life. And there was no place for desertion or betrayal in there, she couldn’t afford it…

 

The moment Shaw got out of the building John called her.

“NYPD had already cleared the scene. The package will probably be at the evidence locker or still inside the car at the police impound.”

“Ok, why don’t you send detective Riley to the evidence room and I’ll go check the scrapyard”

“Already en route”

_Couldn’t you just say ‘on my way’?_

 

That drive was endless! She couldn’t stop feeling the emptiness she had left behind. The only person she had ever cared about hated her and it was all her fault. She tried to convince herself that it was for the best, that Root was going to imperil her life again, that she was doing this for her. But she was lying…

She licked her lips and felt the taste and the sense of Root’s kiss. It was still there, a reminder of what she had done. Even her perfume was haunting her, hovering in the air she was breathing and going down on her empty heart to fill it with guilt and regret.

 

Breaking into the yard and finding the car, or whatever was left of it, was easy. In the sight of the car her stomach tightened. It was a tickler of how easily she can destroy everything that makes contact with her. She had completely wrecked it just like she did with Root over and over again.

The package was there intact. She tried to reach it but couldn’t. Her head was spinning when a sharp pain emerged from it like a terrible hangover. A figure appeared in front of her as she collapsed onto the ground.

“Root!” Her face was calm and sweet. She was smiling at her with that gorgeous mouth of hers while hands were caressing her cheek. It felt like aurora after a successful mission in Miami, a cocktail on the beach, big bright eyes stripping her and an overpowering desire for fillet! Shaw raised her hand to touch her but she was gone. Vanished in the air. “Please stay” she begged before passing out.

 

_The figure dragged her into a car and drove away..._


	7. High Voltage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rock 'n' roll

_“Root!”_

 

Shaw starts recovering her consciousness. The haze is still there as the obscure figure welcomes her.

“Hello there” It’s a high frequency voice, not too high to be a kid and not too low to be a man.

The blur is leaving her slowly and she can see clearly now the woman smiling at her. Blonde hair fastened high on her head, a deadly look that can scare you to death, plain clothes and a military discipline in her poise.

_That’s definitely the last person i would want to capture me_

Shaw flashes a fake smile and lifts her head. “Bitch”. It was the least she could say if you consider that she is sitting in a chair, tied up and with a terrible pain in her head.

“Well it’s a progress. At least you stopped calling me Root. Do I really look like her?”

Shaw laughs like there is joke somewhere. “No, if you exclude that you are both psychotic bitches talking to machines”

That came out so naturally, not that it meant anything. She knows that this is about Root and she is not willing to reveal any kind of connection they may have. She won’t reveal how much she wanted to see Root, how desperately wished that she would surpass the grief that Shaw had caused her and turn it into anger and hatred.

“Come on Sameen there is no reason to hide your true feelings from me, I’m not gonna give them away”

Her name sounded like a blasphemy in her lips. Only Root called her like that and every time was the most pleasing mechanic wave that had ever vibrated her tympanic membrane. Shaw rolls her eyes with annoyance but doesn’t say a word. After all everything she says will be used against her. She has done it herself more times than she can remember and on each occasion it had worked quite successfully.

“So, no sharing? Never mind, you can just tell me where she is.”

_Oh hell, she just moved to the second part of the interrogation process. I guess the ‘familiarize’ part didn’t go so well. Next step: Establishing her demands. I have to play my role so that we can move on to the fun part…_

“I have no idea”

_And here it is…_

Martine walks away and returns with a small table on wheels.

_And what is that over there? Oh that’s a woman after my own heart!_

“Latest technology! Only the best for you Sameen!”

_There is no need to electroshock me if you continue calling me like that. It’s already a torture!_

“Is this a high voltage programmable AC/DC power supply? I love that stuff!” She wasn’t lying. She did love torturing people with power supplies, at least since this day…

“Thank you for appreciating my thought. I do hear that you really enjoy being tased! You can call me Root if it turns you on.”

Shaw continues staring at her imperviously. “I’ll pass”

_Crap, she knows more than I expected._

Martine flashes a smile at her and pretends to be surprised “Now that I mention it. I have to turn on the camera. We don’t want to deny your friends of watching you ‘having fun’, do we?”

Shaw finally expresses an emotion. It’s wonder! “Oh I see… You are the sex-tape kind of girl”

It was a desperate attempt to procrastinate and it didn’t work. Martine kept setting the camera while her people were attaching the electrodes to Shaw’s fingers.

“Ok, we are recording. Are you going to tell me where Root is?”

Shaw’s face turns instantly into its serious mode as she replies “I’m afraid I have to politely deny”

Martine doesn’t lose her cheerful mood. On the contrary she seems pleased by her answer.

“I’m glad you did. The ‘Torture 101’ handbook suggests that part of the interrogation process is that the victim feels utterly helpless, like there is nothing else to be said apart from the truth. But I really like you, so I’m going to give you a choice” she stays silent for a moment, only to give Shaw the hope that she needs. And then takes it away, “AC or DC?”

Shaw doesn’t take the bait. She knows better than anyone that technic. _It’s almost boring how predictable she is, camera excepted._ The choice she has to make is not much of a dilemma. She knows how the direct and alternating current works, especially when it comes to electroshocking people. AC is more dangerous than DC but if you don’t want to kill your victim DC offers great potential of maximum pain.

Calculating pros and cons of her imminent torment wasn’t the best way to occupy her mind but surprisingly it worked. She doesn’t choose though. It’s enough for her that she doesn’t cross door number 3 which is giving Root away.

“Just plug me in bitch!”

Martine smiles. It’s like she expects each and every response and it satisfies her even more every time she is right.

“In that case I’ll have to choose for you. You know, I don’t really care about the pain or the possibility of death. I only want to see you dance and I hear that AC causes, among others, extended contractions.”

_And here comes the fun part…_

Martine turns on the power source and sets the parameters.

 

**10 mA**

Shaw leans back her head unwittingly and freezes in that position. It’s a familiar phase…

“I assume you know that feeling. It’s the taser’s current! Although I heard that the human body can’t surpass the 10 seconds limit under high voltage. Didn’t understand why, something like reducing body’s resistance and increasing current flow. Anyway I’ll settle with it, let’s not kill you… yet.”

The 10 seconds passed and she closed the supply.

Shaw doesn’t regain just yet control over her muscles. The pain is almost bearable. _At least more bearable than hearing Martine’s verbiage._

That’s another technic, analyzing the details of the torture. How the current will burn your internals, how your heart will start fibrillating, how your muscles are going to convulse.

“I’ll ask again. Where is Root?”

Shaw smiles as soon as she can control her mouth. “Bite me”

 

**20 mA**

It’s above the ‘let-go’ range. Her body is slowly shaking and her hands are clasping the chair’s arms while she is grumbling of pain.

“Do you know what I love about electricity? It makes the exact same damage like fire but it has the ability to burn your tissue beneath the skin, as well as your organs. It’s marvelous the way it works. It begins burning your fingers, moves to your internals and then it resurfaces just to start all over again!”

10 seconds had passed when she turned it off.

Shaw stays still. Anyhow, there are few things that she can actually do. Moving or talking isn’t one of them. Hurting definitely is. She feels every little nerve in her body overloading like there is some kind of violent burst of energy happening.

“As much as I enjoy our conversation, I’m afraid that you won’t be able to continue talking from now on so I’ll have to soliloquize. We do need a way to communicate though. I’m going to ask you the same question and if you are willing to answer honestly you blink. Let’s say five times to be sure cause electricity has a propensity to mess with your nervous system. So?”

Shaw stares at her inexpressively. She tries not to blink, not even once. And she succeeds. Even when her eyes are filled with tears she doesn’t blink. Can’t give away any sign of breaking.

 

**50 mA**

The pain is intolerable. She cannot keep her body still. It is convulsing rapidly bruising her restrained limbs and making her breath stop for a moment. She doesn’t feel anger or fear though. There is no room in her nervous system for these feelings. There is only pain there, it has overfilled her brain and now is ready to bowl over. One more milliampere and her body will implode.

“This is the part of the respiratory arrest. You can feel the absence of air in your lungs; it’s like drowning without the dying section. Well, I presume this is what you wish right now. But you will not get it, not until you give me Root.”

8 seconds had passed before she shut it down again.

Shaw blinks once exhausted. Her body can’t handle the pain and collapses. A heavenly minute later they bring her round. Her eyes are wide open as she opens her mouth to say something. No sound comes out though, only a groan that reflected the pain and the desperate urge to die.

She blinks twice... _I won’t, I can’t..._ She had already betrayed Root more than once in a day.

Martine finally seems surprised. She never thought that they would have gone so far. “Does she really deserve all that suffering? You don’t really believe that if she was in your position she would endure this torment, do you?” No response came, “You disappoint me Shaw. We are approaching a red area and I honestly don’t want to see you die of cardiac arrest. It’s a little degrading considering your spectacular history.”

 

**80 mA**

“This is it. The probability of ventricular fibrillation and cardiac arrest is at 40%. I’ll try to reduce the duration to avoid affecting permanently the function of your brain IF you survive but I can’t promise anything. You might also feel a little burn at your fingers but I suppose this will be a nugatory pain comparatively to the other...”

She lifts Shaw’s head and asks her again, “Where is Root?”

Shaw closes painfully her eyes. It’s a silent denial; a warm greeting to death along with a fiercely anticipation of his arrival. She is calm and finally peaceful, without the anger that inundated her most of her life.

Martine reluctantly turns on the power supply.

Shaw’s body starts contracting violently and the leash causes her wrist to fracture. The pain is more than unendurable but Shaw is not there anymore…

She is lying naked at a storage-room’s bed. Root’s hands are caressing her collarbone and she feels a gentle electric current flowing from her hand to Shaw’s body making her shudder. It’s more than pleasant. Shaw doesn’t move an inch, only shivers while Root is rubbing her naked body and staring at her with a playful smile that can make her head spin like an electric motor under high voltage. And it’s becoming more like a vibration of her body when she pulls her near and kisses affectionately her lips. Shaw keeps still though, holding her eyes closed and feeling every touch, every kiss…

Root lays her head in Shaw’s sternum and their heartbeats synchronize.

Until they stop…

 

Somewhere in an abandoned subway station a woman tied up is staring at a fallen computer screen.

She is screaming and crying and rolling in the floor…

 

_The screen turns black only when the person in it stops convulsing…_

 

 


	8. You shook me all night long

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is crippled cause someone keeps sabotaging my writing...

A vexatious silence is hanging over the abandoned subway. It’s more than annoying, it’s suffocating.

Root tries to inhale all the oxygen she can get, but something is wrong. Her lungs are subverting the entrance of every molecule that tries to penetrate her larynx. It’s like her smooth muscles are becoming voluntary and waiting for her to move them. Breathing is not reflexive anymore and she wonders if her heart also requires that she pump the blood through her vessels.

Her hands start tingling only to remind her how she got herself into that situation. It’s crystal clear that Shaw wasn’t to blame about hurting her, anyhow they both knew it. How could she even think that Shaw could care about her, about anyone as a matter of fact.

After all Shaw was doing her job, protecting their number at all cost. If only Root had done hers and had protected herself. She only consigned her heart to Shaw without a second thought and now she is suffering the consequences.

 

A female’s voice interrupts suddenly her gloomy thoughts. _“Ok, we are recording. Are you going to tell me where Root is?”_

The voice is coming from one of the computers. She drags her legs towards the fallen screen and rotates it so that it faces her.

A blonde woman’s back is projected and at the same damned moment a familiar voice sounds.

 _“I’m afraid I have to politely deny”_.

It was a serious as well as mocking statement.

Martine moves away and the voice becomes bricks and mortar. Aghast Root stares stunned at a tied up Shaw with blood flowing out of her head and a look that could indicate enjoyment. _How’s that even possible?_

Martine says something but Root doesn’t hear. Her heartbeat engulfs every other sound preventing her from hearing anything else.

_“Just plug me in bitch!”_

That was a wakeup call. Root starts shaking her hands in order to free them from their leash. She hadn’t tried it the moment Shaw left the subway and her deficient psychological stash didn’t allow her to try it after that either .

Nothing worked though. Shaw had prognosticated remarkably well how resourceful Root is and fended not to leave her any leeway out of there.

 

The spectacle keeps going…

 

10 mA. 20 mA. 50 mA. She keeps staring at Shaw unable to utter a word. This woman has a way of hurting her even when she doesn’t do anything, not even a blink. Tears are running unwittingly from her eyes but she can’t wipe them away. They are a reminder of how powerless and weak she is. How she was and still is deceived by Shaw, for she betrayed her when Root needed to be protected and protected her when she should have betrayed her. Always a crosspatch…

 

80 mA. Shaw’s convulsions are becoming more violent and dangerous, sarcastically provoking death to stumble on her.

Root closes her eyes. There is no room in her retina for what is about to happen. There is no room in her life for another loss and foremost Shaw’s, who had been a perpetual motive force for her for quite some time.

The sound of Shaw’s chair scraping on the floor is impaling her ears. She can’t close them too though.

Root tries to occupy her mind and only one memory is able to succeed it. Her thought stows away to a depressing storage. A scruffy bed and a naked woman on it. Root extends her hand and caresses Shaw’s collarbone. A gentle electric current circulates from the lying woman to her. She feels her cold and pale. Cannot betray it though. Only flashes a sad smile and rubs her naked body feeling her skin for the first and last time. Shaw quivers when Root kisses her. Then it starts getting more rapid and more and more and violent and deadly. Root freaks out but she can’t reveal anything, she can’t bring her back into reality, not anymore; only pain and torturous death waits for her there.

She just rests her head in Shaw’s sternum and hearkens to her leisurely heartbeat.

Until it stops…

 

 

_Somewhere in an abandoned subway station a woman tied up is staring at a fallen computer screen._

_She is screaming and crying and rolling in the floor…_

 

_The screen turns black only when the person in it stops convulsing…_


	9. Hey You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Together we stand, divided we fall._

Two hours had passed. Two agonizing hours of darkness and ignorance.

Harold and John walked into the subway facing a mess of ripped papers, books, fallen screens and a woman. She didn’t look like anyone they knew. Her characteristics were rough and her gaze empty, achy, like an oldster’s who had nothing else to expect from life than death.

She was lying on the floor weary and curled up staring at them, silently refusing to accept a death knell. And mercifully they didn’t have any.

The warehouse where Martine kept Shaw had been cleared by the time they got there. Only a piece of paper was left behind, a dolorous reminder of the drama that was performed. And it was a genuine Athenian tragedy, a hymn praising the human strength. But it was incomplete. _Mimesis_ had already been played with a merciless success leaving the main hero in shreds and the audience appalled. _Catharsis_ though was yet to be seen. It was the purification… the redemption that spectators were seeking; a closure!

_Still alive, come and get her…_

That message was the only closure they could get but it was enough for Root to embrace life again and start taking initiatives.

“Unloose me!” It sounded authoritative and it definitely was.

John moved forward and cut off the bonds. Her wrists were bruised from the struggle but she didn’t mind, she just marched towards the door only to be obstructed by John. “Don’t…” He knew exactly what she had in mind. It was what he would have done if Carter was in Shaw’s position but that wouldn’t have made it any less foolish.

Root spared him a glance and turned to Harold hoping for a hortatory nod. She didn’t take anything though and the worst was that deep down she fathomed the recklessness of her thought. Trading her life with Shaw’s was the most mindless decision she had ever made and it didn’t require any second thoughts. But that wasn’t the case. Giving herself in would have been a meaningless suicide considering that if she was in the seat of power she would have killed her captives without even blinking.

“Fine, but we need a plan and it’d better be good because it’s only the three of us against all Samaritan’s agents. The Machine is out of the picture in this one” That sounded more like an accusation than a statement. Luckily nobody noticed as Harold presented his idea.

“I have something that I was saving for an emergency and I believe the situation is more than suitable…”

 

An hour later the screens lightened again. The Machine couldn’t help them but She kept projecting the videos that Samaritan was uploading. Root swallowed hardly and a knot tightened her esophagus when a worn body, very similar to Shaw’s, was put on display. It seemed like an empty vessel, a corpse in decomposition. Harold had to approach the screen even closer in order to discern if that body could actually hold a life in it. Root didn’t move though, she kept staring at the frozen body that she used to tease and recaptured for a moment an illusion of her caressing and holding Shaw’s naked body in her hands. But even that was a lie, an unfulfilled dream...

The pressure her fingernails were putting on her hand brought her back to reality making her flinch. The body was still there, lying down on the floor incapable of moving. If you watched closely though, you could detect a little movement in its legs. It wasn’t volitional but it was there, something like a tremor or a spasm. Root felt her eyes wet and turned around as if Shaw –considering Shaw was still inside that body-was going to notice her tears and roll her eyes in frustration like she always did... _DOES, not did!_

Martine’s demands were clear, both the obvious and the brewing. Because there was no reason to keep torturing Shaw, she wouldn’t give in and they all knew it. Something about that video was different. The place, the transparent windows in the building, the sounds… They wanted to be found! Harold ran a quick search of the area filling in the parameters that Martine had just betrayed and the location appeared before their eyes.

There was no time for words. The three of them headed out almost simultaneously, closing in a trap that was waiting for them to fall into.

 

 

The building was filled with Samaritan’s agents; no recons or guards in the exits. They were all inside, waiting and torturing. John and Root showed up with Harold as a technical support in their ear. He was actually playing Machine’s role since he had hacked into the electronic surveillance of the edifice and directed his assets.

Their two-membered team walked in through the main entrance and all hell broke loose.

Samaritan’s operatives maintained absolute power over them as they were playing hide and seek for quite some time, until something totally unexpected (at least for them) happened. Bullets started flying from both sides of the building as if they were inadvertently caught in the crossfire of a gang’s battle. It took them a while to realize that they were surrounded but as soon as they did it was too late. There was nowhere to go. They were trapped like a mouse in a maze and the only thing they could do was pray that they would walk again soon after the bullets that john was going to place into their knees.

Although they prayed and they begged, Root didn’t spare them. Harold was shouting in her ear and John tried to grab her but none of these had worked. She was out on a killing spree and nobody was going to stop her, for she had turned into the old Root, the cold-blooded killer. Dead bodies trailed behind her until the shooting had stopped.

Some of the agents survived with damaged knees and shoulders but the others… The others had encountered Root!

 

A very accurate replica of Tony Montana appeared from the back of the building holding an M4 carbine and being followed by his associates. Elias had kept his word and it was time for Harold to do the same, “I trust you to find Ms Shaw and take her to safety. I have promised an explanation to someone”. And he left…

Elias was so eager to know the truth about the actual war that was underway that lavishly offered his help to recover Shaw (or Shaw’s body). Anyway, he always liked enough that woman’s style to let her die for an unavailing -for him- cause.

 

There was one room left in the building that wasn’t raided yet. John showed Root the way and extended his hand to open the door only to be stopped in the process. “I can’t” There was fear in her voice. Something that John had never seen coming from Root and never thought that will ever see. He tried to utter something but she shut him down. “Just text me if she is alive” and left.

John stands alone in front of the door and stares at it haltingly for a moment, until he opens it…

 

 _‘She is alive_ ’, a wave of relief and pain crashes into her stomach as she leans on a wall in a desperate attempt not to collapse. Air is bursting into her lungs as if she had hours to breathe. And she did…

Few hours later she receives another text, _‘I’ve taken Shaw to her apartment. Maybe you could keep an eye on her?_ ’

The sky is coming down to crush her again. How can she look her in the eye after all this torment she went through because of her? There aren’t even enough words to apologize for that. Maybe she’ll get lucky and Shaw will shoot her before she can even make a sound.

 

She enters the building as soon as John’s leaving. “How is she?”

“She is…different! Oh and she just woke up for a hundredth time so try not to piss her off”

_Different?_

 

John had left the door of the apartment open as if he knew that Root would hesitate again. And he would have been right. Even with an open door Root couldn’t step in. There was a resonant silence echoing from that bedroom.

Eventually she finds the carriage to walk in. Shaw is lying huddled up in the corner of the bed squeezing strongly her pillow as if it was Root’s neck. Her eyes are closed and she almost seems peaceful. Root sits in the chair by her side pleased that Shaw is sleeping. Her heartbeat starts reducing its rhythm to reach her normal pulse. Not for too long though. Shaw opens her eyes and stares apathetic at her.

Root’s heart rate starts increasing with exponential growth as she flashes a sad smile at the lying woman. There isn’t any response though, not even a blink. “Shaw?” Still no response. It’s like she is sleeping with her eyes open. “Shaw!” Her voice’s volume is barely up.

This little impulse stimulates her and starts convulsing, just like she did hours ago when the electrodes were still attached in her fingers. Root instantly grabs her arms and seconds later manages to immobilize her.

Shaw moves her eyes towards Root and this time really looks at her only to avert her eyes the exact same moment. That and only movement was enough to hurt Root more than any other strike.

“Do you want me to leave?”

Shaw has closed her eyes again. Root can’t wait for an answer, that silence is more painful than a clear positive response.

She stands up and all of a sudden a cold hand grabs her wrist. The fingers are burned and an oversized bruise spreads throughout her wrist. Root’s astounded eyes meet Shaw’s. “Stay…” eyes are almost begging “…please.” That was something that she had never heard from Shaw. Not her, not anyone…

She sits back down and handles lightly Shaw’s lifted hand. The sight and only of that hand brings tears in her eyes and she quickly wipes them away as she brushes it with her own bruised hand. Shaw keeps gazing at her steadfastly and… _different!_

“I uh… I’m so sorry” Root finally manages to utter between her sobbing. Nevertheless, Shaw remains silent and still. There is not even a hint of anger in her gaze; she is surprisingly calm like a peaceful sea before the storm. But the storm in this case is nowhere to be found.

Shaw brushes aside and points to the emptiness of the bed. Root feels her head dizzy as she stands up again but for a wholly different reason. As long as she can remember she’s never been closer to Shaw, well she never let her get any closer.

She takes a deep breath and sinks herself into the sheets opposite Shaw, as far as she can feel her breath in her nose. Root extends hesitantly her hand to Shaw and starts caressing her cheek. Shaw doesn’t back off, just stays excessively motionless.

Only when Root’s finger accidentally touches her eyelash airily and makes her blink she reacts. “NO! I can’t” Her head moves slightly back just to avoid Root’s touch.

“What?” Root was clearly inquisitive by that counterblast.

“I CAN’T” Shaw keeps staring at her with the sad look of an unappreciated child.

“What can’t you do?”

Shaw lowers her eyes like if she was just scolded. She seems tired and defeated and ashamed as she speaks with the lowest volume she can produce…

“I can’t blink” She raises her eyes again “I can’t.”

 

Root’s tears run through her cheek to the sheets as she pulls her close and hugs her tightly. And Shaw doesn’t resist, just snuggles up to Root’s collarbone breathing softly in her neck.

 

Root tightens her hands around Shaw and plants a kiss on her forehead.

 

“You don’t have to”

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it... Thank you all for reading me!


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